the hell walked through
so long ago
to find the one
that one special person
to find the thing known as happiness
the tears i shed
the blood spilled
the souls destroyed
all for this
i remember
looking to the fiery abyss
hoping to find a kiss on the other side
hope to much
to find myself at defeats hand
the years i wasted
those moments shared
the eyes i got lost in
all a lie
the sad part
the pathetic part being
i'd go through all of it
again
all fir that sense of hope
knowing already that it will only lead me right back to defeat
another face: sleeping princess pt2 by N4rizenwolfflame, literature
Literature
another face: sleeping princess pt2
time and time
again i see those faces
those eyes
hear those lies
years on end
what seems like eons
this
prison holding me
rocking me
lulling me in to an inescapable
slumber
with dreams through someone else's eyes
someones life...
not mine
not the life i vaguely remember
time and time
again i see
nothing
feel the cold
wet
heavy
rocking
seconds...
never giving in
never giving up
prison slowly melting
collapsing
barely loosening the strangle hold
i feel like a doll.
another face: sleeping princess by N4rizenwolfflame, literature
Literature
another face: sleeping princess
all these years
cold and lonely
memories of a
foreign past slowly slip back
deep into her mind
through the glass
ice castle
floating in the middle of no where...
free write death 1 by N4rizenwolfflame, literature
Literature
free write death 1
wake up
dazed confused
memories of explosions
loud noises
fresh in the mind
never minding that
light bulb on
memory all there
...
almost
look around
at the desolate land
destroyed land
with no clue as to where you are
how you got here
just remembering you died
just to see you smile
i will
be happy be close to you...
no need for material things, they don not bring about happiness
just to see you smile
i will
take an interest in things you like
be there for you when you need me...
if we don't know each other, then we shouldn't be together
just to see you smile
i will give my all
but not my life
if i died, you would be sad
so i can never say i would die for you
you love me
you lust for me
you hold me
you want to ... me
your lies i see through them
but i couldn't be happier
or...
i am not sure what happiness
is...
does it bring you pain and false joy
or is there something better waiting on the other side
but
you love me
lust after ...
you hold me
while you think ...
if this is happiness you can keep it
but i feel better with you than without
almost as much as rotting from the inside out
i will never be your play thing
ever again
or any one else's
no matter how much they say "i love you"
i am better off by myself
Pages of a torn life by N4rizenwolfflame, literature
Literature
Pages of a torn life
i kill spill blood
run through village
tear everything apart
the sky always shining
even through the black clouds
the smile on my face never fading...
when there is someone around
living this lie
almost bliss
if it didn't feel like i was dying every second
like i was empty shallow
hollow
hole through the heart
and hole through the soul
just because i poke holes
in the truth
trained this way
to walk this way
talk this way
never an open book
never opening up
no friends lover family
just the organization
and the weapons i use...
maybe these are the reasons i sit in my room and cry at night.
look to the sky
pray to the
heavens for
peace
love
happiness
and it will...
come
that is what i used
to think
in
my younger days
now a bit older
more intelligent
i realize no one
no matter how much i open up
how many people around me...
i will always feel alone
filled with ...
an unfortunate love for everything
that i can't explain.
another piece of evil
slips deep
into my soul
breaking me apart
no longer whole
giant holes forming in
my flesh
thinking about
i need a fresh start
this pain unbearable
i wonder if any one even cares
any more
feeling
so
war
t o
r n
cuts to the flesh
bruises the the heart
water to my soul
i need a savior
hold my hand
walk by me
dry my tears
cuddle during cold nights
i feel so dead
one lover lost
one world destroyed
the guardian no more
just clinging to...
maybe i should just quit life.
the hell walked through
so long ago
to find the one
that one special person
to find the thing known as happiness
the tears i shed
the blood spilled
the souls destroyed
all for this
i remember
looking to the fiery abyss
hoping to find a kiss on the other side
hope to much
to find myself at defeats hand
the years i wasted
those moments shared
the eyes i got lost in
all a lie
the sad part
the pathetic part being
i'd go through all of it
again
all fir that sense of hope
knowing already that it will only lead me right back to defeat
just to see you smile
i will
be happy be close to you...
no need for material things, they don not bring about happiness
just to see you smile
i will
take an interest in things you like
be there for you when you need me...
if we don't know each other, then we shouldn't be together
just to see you smile
i will give my all
but not my life
if i died, you would be sad
so i can never say i would die for you
you love me
you lust for me
you hold me
you want to ... me
your lies i see through them
but i couldn't be happier
or...
i am not sure what happiness
is...
does it bring you pain and false joy
or is there something better waiting on the other side
but
you love me
lust after ...
you hold me
while you think ...
if this is happiness you can keep it
but i feel better with you than without
almost as much as rotting from the inside out
i will never be your play thing
ever again
or any one else's
no matter how much they say "i love you"
i am better off by myself
Pages of a torn life by N4rizenwolfflame, literature
Literature
Pages of a torn life
i kill spill blood
run through village
tear everything apart
the sky always shining
even through the black clouds
the smile on my face never fading...
when there is someone around
living this lie
almost bliss
if it didn't feel like i was dying every second
like i was empty shallow
hollow
hole through the heart
and hole through the soul
just because i poke holes
in the truth
trained this way
to walk this way
talk this way
never an open book
never opening up
no friends lover family
just the organization
and the weapons i use...
maybe these are the reasons i sit in my room and cry at night.
look to the sky
pray to the
heavens for
peace
love
happiness
and it will...
come
that is what i used
to think
in
my younger days
now a bit older
more intelligent
i realize no one
no matter how much i open up
how many people around me...
i will always feel alone
filled with ...
an unfortunate love for everything
that i can't explain.
another piece of evil
slips deep
into my soul
breaking me apart
no longer whole
giant holes forming in
my flesh
thinking about
i need a fresh start
this pain unbearable
i wonder if any one even cares
any more
feeling
so
war
t o
r n
cuts to the flesh
bruises the the heart
water to my soul
i need a savior
hold my hand
walk by me
dry my tears
cuddle during cold nights
i feel so dead
one lover lost
one world destroyed
the guardian no more
just clinging to...
maybe i should just quit life.
all those years ago
the fun we had
so immature
so fragile
snatched apart
one lost one gained
i guess my blessing
spell of happiness
worked
in such a way
all of those years
apart
i never forgot you
same walk
same talk
bright smiling face
the one person i'll never forget
so grown
after all of those years
these years
brings tears of joy to my face
you've grown to be such a beautiful person
my little CJ
the house burning
all around me
bloody body
not mine
but i feel so broken
building collapsing
down around me
flames eating away at me
i hear a familiar voice
as i fade into deaths arms
the memory of the time i harmed her
my words so cruel
intention so pure
looking at death
inviting arms
warm air cross my ear
"go home"
words i hear over crying
tears singing "crazy for you..."
...
only once the end is near
the thing that is most dear to me...
then and only then will i understand how she feels
the thing that kills me the most
is knowing i will only be able to feel love
when i fall into hell's abyss
already knowing from dreams, visions, nightmares
that love will be at my finger tips
already knowing that i will only be able to hold it close
only after the blood
the pain
the tears
already sad, that i will only feel love after death steals my heart away from my one true love...
In stage four of transformation. Incomplete, may experience severe emotional outburst due to lack of mp3.
Favourite genre of music: pop MP3 player of choice: ematic e5 series Favourite cartoon character: Lucy (Elfen Lied) Personal Quote: Life is hard, but no matter what, giving up is not an answer
i always come back to da. that is the good news. bad news i am done with this account.
so follow me here my little ones.
!EbonyArmorPhoenix (https://www.deviantart.com/ebonyarmorphoenix)
This maybe my last time getting on DeviantArt i am... Going away. i might come back, but that is unlikely. So just in case i truly am done, i will try to create one more poem for you all to remember me by.
http://n4rizenwolfflame.deviantart.com/art/hope-297674036
I am not sure why? but I think I am out of poems, or maybe I no longer want to create any more. idk...
see you later... maybe
forever yours
Aya.
P.S.
http://n4rizenwolfflame.deviantart.com/art/for-me-280993772